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Ep 09 | What does Anxiety Look Like?

Anxiety – of all shapes and forms – affects everyone at some point in their lives. This isn’t anything we’ve found factually (although it could be true).  It’s just something that we’ve experienced as we’ve talked to other families and friends.  If you’ve experienced any level of anxiety yourself, or with your kiddos then please take a listen to this episode.


This is Part 1 of a 2 part series.

This episode is all about what anxiety looks like in our household and what Trish has experienced in her family and business.  The next episode will be all about how to combat anxiety.

Anxiety with Elinor started when she was in 1st grade.  Her behavior changed quite a bit.  Her triggers were around perfectionism, test anxiety, and older kiddos.

The brain is trying to protect us.  And if it gets overactive it creates anxiety.  By recognizing your triggers, you can help to create new pathways.

Anxiety can look very different for different people.  For some, it’s minor meltdowns and for others, it can be aggressive.  Learning the triggers can be really helpful in working through it and regaining control.

Having teachers trained in working with different types of kids brain makeups can be extremely helpful in making a more comfortable and less disruptive classroom.  There is more training than there used to be, but there is still a ways to go.

At times it can be difficult to understand the difference between “growing up” and anxiety.  Having conversations and working together as a  family is a great start.

Elinor often complained about her stomach hurting.  Our therapist told us that your emotions are often held in your stomach.  So before you can understand and verbalize what’s going on, you feel the pain in your stomach.  Other people feel it in different ways – like in your back.

Perfectionism is common.  Learning to make mistakes is a big part of combating it!  Easier said than done.  “Perfect is the enemy of the good,” is what Chuck said to his family all the time.

Please feel free to reach out regarding any comments you have about what you’ve heard on this episode at

Time Stamp

(2:33) What was Elinor’s experience with anxiety?
(3:44) Timed test anxiety
(5:05) What did anxiety look like in Trish’s household and is there more anxiety with younger kids now?
(6:15) Does Elinor talk about anxiety with her friends and what does it look like?
(7:45) How can teachers better work with kids with anxiety?
(9:18) What’s the difference between emotional changes vs more going on?
(11:21) Stomach pains are a common complaint
(14:25) Perfectionism


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Trish Wilkinson

Trish Wilkinson

Co-Author, Brain Stages: How to Raise Smart, Confident Kids and Have Fun Doing It, K-5

Trish Wilkinson, co-author of Brain Stages: How to Raise Smart, Confident Kids and Have Fun Doing It, K-5 and mother of two twice-exceptional children, has taught grades kindergarten through sixth in both public and private schools. She earned a BA in recreation from California State University, Long Beach, where she first discovered the power of play to educate kids — socially and emotionally as well as academically. Trish did graduate work at California State Universities, Los Angeles and Chico, to earn a Clear Multiple-Subject Teaching Credential and Language Development Specialist certification. Today, Trish facilitates life-changing workshops for parents and teachers. It’s amazing what can happen when years of creativity and practical experience merge with thousands of hours of brain research. She lives in Bend, Oregon, with her awesome husband, Chuck, and their rambunctious golden retriever, Alice. After the podcast, you can visit her at

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Elinor (daughter) and Sami (mom) were on vacation in Phoenix in March or 2019 when the concept of the mother-daughter podcast was born.

Sami, a digital marketing strategist, was working on her own podcast, when Elinor decided she needed one of her own.  When talking about concepts, the idea of having regular chats about life and recording them came up.

And with that, Conversations with My Daughter was born.

Each week, a new topic, and possible life lesson, are brought to you with the hopes it will make you smile, remember conversations with your own mom, and hopefully inspire new conversations with your own children.